Thursday, May 1, 2008

Quilting Update & What Makes Me Tick

So today I went on Joann's website to see what some of the quilting supplies would cost me (when I made my last quilt I didn't have a rotary cutter, board, and acrylic ruler) I was just amazing and did it on my own (lol.) This time around I decided to buy them. Luckily Joann's was having a sale (what else is new) and I got all 3 for less than $40.00. They were 40% off. Hooray. I'm so excited for them to arrive and for me to get a job so I can REALLY splurge and go buy nice fabric. I love crafting, its very relaxing.

On a related note, sometimes I feel like I'm a split personality. There's 1/2 of me that just could be a crafty little homemaker all day long and be happy as a clam. And then there's 1/2 of me that loves statistics, political science, and trying to solve all the worlds problems through lofty political discussion. It's a bizarre combination and I'm willing to admit it. I don't even understand myself.

I really wish I could satisfy both halves of my personality. I wish I could do it all. But I can't. A lot of people have asked why I left graduate school. Let me tell you, many tears were shed making that decision, but it was the right one. It was hard to give up the thought of being in college forever, doing something I'm good at, and getting to work on trying to answer big questions like "Why do nations go to war?" I miss it. I miss it a lot. But I began to realize that in order to be a successful academic I would have to make sacrifices in raising my children that caused panic attacks if I began to ponder the reality of it. I also realized that after having my children, my career, and church there would be time for little else in my life. No crafting, no picking up new hobbies, no Lavendar Days and Friday night concerts in the Park. And on top of it all I would be constantly stressed trying to balance it all. (I should stress that not all academics feel this way, some of them are very good at making the most of every available second of their day and some are just superhuman---case in point: my advisor Jan Box-Steffensmeier) So, that's why I left graduate school. I miss political science but I will always have nytimes.com, John Stewart, Stephen Colbert, and The Onion to keep me posted on the world. If I get an itch for actual scholarly political science I can call one of my grad school friends and offer to give them feedback on a paper. So there you go, the real story behind my seemingly crazy decision.

5 little remarks:

Graham & Heather said...

You aren't alone feeling like that. As I am working right now with Graham in school I often have some of those same thoughts and worries. Glad to know I'm not the only one!

Heather said...

Thanks for explaining the whole google reader thing for me! It's such a great little gadget!!!

For what it's worth Anna - I have so much respect for you and the decision you've made to leave graduate school. I think you're a very well rounded person, and even though it is hard sometimes to feel of real worth when you are "just" a stay at home mom/wife, I know that it really is the most important thing that we can do with our lives! At least you've been able to graduate from college before beginning your journey as a mother. That's one thing that I wish I would have stuck with - I feel so dumb sometimes to not have a degree. Oh well - someday!

Bethany said...

You're my hero.

Brandon said...

We don't see eye-to-eye on certain things, but I'm impressed by your decision, Anna.

Anna said...

Bethany...woah woah woah, which Bethany is this. I like to know who's hero I am. :)

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